Knock-knock
by Soronume
Summary: It's Craig's 25th birthday, and he, Clyde, and Token are planning something extra special involving a few cringey knock-knock jokes.


**_Craig's 25th birthday_**

Everyone was at the party. Music was blaring, Stan and Kyle were dancing with each other, Clyde was stuffing his face with pizza while Bebe looked on him with disgust, Token and Nichole were cuddling in a corner, Kenny was trying to convince Butters to dance with him again, Cartman was trying to tell everyone what his mom was getting him for Craig's birthday, Tweek and Craig's parents were chatting on the couch in their sons' apartment, and the birthday boy himself and his boyfriend were just talking and kissing.

"They're so gay," Mr Tweak thought to himself.

After a few hours, everyone gathered around Craig and the lights went down. A cake with the numbers 25 in candles was lit.

"Happy birthday to you..." everyone began to sing.

"Make a wish, Craigy!" Tweek said and kissed his boyfriend on the cheek.

"I wish that tonight will go as planned..." Craig thought, shot a look at Clyde, and then blew out all the candles in one go.

After everyone finished their cake, the parents went back to the other room to continue talking, and all the partygoers sat in a circle.

"What do you guys want to play?" Token asked.

"Truth or Dare, obviously," Stan answered.

"Perfect..." Craig thought, shooting another look at Clyde.

"Alright, who wants to start?" Clyde asked. Craig looked distracted for a moment in his pockets.

"I will," Craig answered, "Kyle, truth or dare?"

"Truth."

"Hmmm... if you could make out with anyone in the world, who would it be?"

"Easy. Ryan Gosling."

"Dude, what the hell?!" Stan demanded.

"Sorry dude, he said anyone and I already make out with you more than daily and love it."

"Fine, you're excused."

"Ok," Kyle continued, "Token, truth or dare?"

"Dare."

"I dare you to call your parents and tell them you TP'd their house all those years ago."

"No freaking way man! Chicken, I didn't do it Cartman did!"

"Bawk bawk bawwwwwwk!" Cartman clucked.

"Fine, be chicken then and not play."

"Fine," he said exasperated, "I'll do it." The phone rang for a few seconds until his mom answered. "Hi, mom? You know when the house was TP'd when we were 11 at my birthday? That was me. Bye mom," he ended, "OH GOD THAT WAS HELL WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU KYLE?"

"Dude that was hilarious! You're in deep shit when you get home!"

"Ughhh. Fine. Kyle you're the worst, I don't know what Stan sees in you. Clyde, truth or dare?"

"I usually pick dare, but for now I'll go truth," he said honestly.

"Ok, why do you pretend you're not only in love with Bebe's boobs?" Bebe shot Clyde a very dirty look.

"Dude, what the hell! I love Bebe! She's smart, she's cool, she's willing to do anything..." Clyde continued.

"God dude, you sound just like when we were in fourth grade and her boobs turned us into apes!" Kenny mused.

"Shut up Kenny! Bebe is actually super cool and smart, she's in law school you know!"

"Thanks babe..." Bebe muttered.

"Ok, Craig, truth or dare?" This was Craig's moment. He knew just why Clyde picked him, they had been planning this for a long time. Craig's heart sped up and his face went red.

"Craig, are you okay?" Tweek asked sweetly.

"Yeah I'm fine babe. Just wait a sec." Clyde nodded to Token who ran out to the room where Tweek and Craig's parents were. "Ok, I'm good. Dare."

"Tell us your worst jokes."

"Dude that's lame," Cartman lamented.

"Ok, here it goes," he started as his parents came in, "Tweek, you do the 'who's there' bit, ok?"

"Pressure... Ok."

"Sweet. Knock-knock"

"Who's there"

"Orange"

"Orange who?"

"Orange ya glad I didn't say banana?"

"Craigy, I love you, but that was so lame." Tweek complained.

"I know, it will get better just wait a sec. Knock-knock"

"Who's there?"

"Illuv"

"Illuv who?

"Illuv you"

"Aww, thanks Craig! I love you too!"

"Ok there's more. Stand up with me?"

"Ok? Gah, pressure, performance, parents, gah..." Tweek muttered.

"Knock-knock"

"Who's there?"

"Hugh"

"Hugh mean the world to me. Knock-knock"

"Who's there"

"Coffee"

"Coffee who?"

"I love you more than you love coffee. Knock-knock"

"Who's there?"

"Will and Mary" Craig fumbled in his pocket for an instant.

"Will and Mary who?" Craig dropped to one knee and opened a small box he removed from his pocket.

"Will you marry me?" Tweek stood stunned in silence. Everyone was watching and waiting for his answer, that was way too much pressure.

"Yes," he whispered, then said stronger, "Yes." He and Craig were beaming as Craig slipped the thin gold band onto Tweek's finger stood up. They were about to cry as their lips came together. Everyone clapped and cheered, their parents were crying, this had to be the happiest moment of both of their lives. They were overjoyed, the moment seemed to last an eternity.

"I have one more joke for you Craigy." Tweek beamed, his smile radiating joy.

"Yeah, gorgeous?"

"Knock-knock"

"Who's there?"

"Tweek"

"Tweek who?"

"Tweek Tucker." Craig claimed Tweek's lips once more as they thought of a life shared together forever. As they got congratulations from everyone, they both thought how happy they'd be if no one ever spoke to them again, and they only had their own company for eternity.

After most of the guests had left Craig's birthday party, Clyde and Token stayed behind to chat with the new fiancés.

"So, you guys going to have a big wedding?" Clyde asked, opening a beer and putting his feet on Tweek and Craig's coffee table.

"Gah! No! Jesus, that's way too much pressure!" Tweek panicked.

"Yeah, probably only the people here today plus my sister, both our grandparents, and probably his aunt and my uncles. Other than that, no one else," Craig explained.

"Well that's good, I would feel kind of awkward at a wedding with a bunch of people I don't know. I usually hate weddings because of that," Token remarked.

"So tell us, who will be best man? Me, your dashing best friend forever, or Token?" Clyde asked.

"Just for calling yourself my 'dashing best friend forever' I'm going to pick Token," Craig mused.

"I thought we could each have one of you as best man. You're both our best friends and each of us needs one, but we'll discuss wedding plans a bit later," Tweek offered.

"Good idea Tweek, it's my birthday I don't want to stress about the wedding now. Now, Token and Clyde, as much as I love you two and it is my birthday, there is someone who I would like to see in his birthday suit," Craig winked at Tweek and he went beet red.

"Craig! They don't need to know what goes on in here!" Tweek quietly reamed him out.

"They already do, we live together dude!" Craig whispered back, then directed his attention back to his friends, "So, I bid you goodnight. Have fun with your girlfriends!"

"Oh I know I will!" Clyde responded with wagging eyebrows.

"Dude that makes it so much creepier. Goodnight!" Craig begged.

"Goodnight guys, and congrats. I'm really happy for you guys," Token said sincerely.

As soon as the door closed behind them, Craig was ready. "Now, let's see that birthday suit, shall we?" And with that they ran into the bedroom for the first time engaged to be married.


End file.
